Twisted Spinster

Laibach is awesome.

This musical interlude has been brought to you by my brain, which is currently on hiatus. Regular broadcasting from my brain will resume shortly.

I feel the same way. My tolerance for politics is always very low, and I’m just burnt out on the subject. For those who still care, the FBI actually arrested the governor of Illinois because basically he was a criminal. Or at least that’s how he’d be described if he were a Republican. Still, the Democrats can’t seem to find a way to spin Blago-whatever’s out-Nixoning of Nixon so they’re trying to replace the matter in the national mind with other subjects. Corruption, thuggish threats, and graft? Who cares — we’ve got fantasy global warming dragons to slay!

Argh! My laptop is dead. When I try to start it, something — a fan, by the air that comes out of the side vent — comes on, and the power lights, but that’s all. It does not boot up. I was so hoping to be able to sell this desktop computer and just use my laptop for a while. I did plan to replace the laptop, but I can’t right now. I can’t even afford to get the laptop fixed. I hope the hard drive hasn’t crashed.

I’m not having a great day.

I feel like I should write a post today, but I just can’t. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that I had a headache all night that just got worse and worse until I woke up with it crushing my skull this morning — and by morning I mean fifteen minutes before noon.

I really need to get up earlier. That’s one whole day basically wasted.

To top it off, I don’t know what the people who used to live in the apartment across the breezeway from mine did to it, but maintenance has been working on the place for a few days now — and by “working” I mean hammering and sawing with a very loud electric saw. Also I think they had one of those carpet dryers running, the kind you leave in a place that’s been soaked by a flood and has mold. That was what I got to hear when I woke up. Of course, I had no pain pills — I’d used them up. I did feel a little better when I got my coffee into me, so part of the headache was caffeine deprivation. Later I went to the grocery store, because I was basically out of everything — toilet paper, food, trivial things like that. And now I have a headache again, because for a very few items I paid over $35.00 — and I don’t buy luxuries except for the whole wheat bread, and that was on sale.

One of my problems is I can’t eat the cheap meals I used to eat. I don’t know what they’ve started putting in those cheap boxes of mac-‘n’-cheese mix, but the last time I prepared one of those my digestive system went nuts. On Saturday I bought one of those containers of prepared fried chicken that Publix makes, and a little tub of potato salad. I had to throw it out — I don’t know if it was the potato salad or the chicken, but I’ve been sick as a dog again. I have to be careful with pasta too — too much of that and I get gassy. I seem to be doing well on oatmeal — but it has to be the Scottish or Irish style, not the gluey regular style, whatever that is, rolled oats? — and fruits and vegetables and fish. But fresh vegetables and fruit aren’t cheap, even in Florida. I buy those pre-made fish filets that you just cook in the oven, they aren’t too expensive. I’m afraid to buy chicken — I don’t seem to be able to make it without turning it dry and rubbery. Red meat gives me indigestion, from the grease. Another problem with fresh vegetables is if you don’t cook them within a few days they are no good. Salads have to be eaten soon as well. I have been going to the store every couple of days — I can’t bear to waste food, so I tend to buy only what I’m going to eat for a day or two, unless it’s frozen.

I’m seeing more tomatoes on my plant, but I have yet to see a ripe one. That first tomato is still green and hard, though now it’s about two and a half inches in diameter. I pinch suckers off the plant every day, and also the new leaves of the new shoots that are trying to grow. I don’t need and more leaves or vines. The yellow tomato plant has finally put out some flowers — it’s growing much more slowly than the red tomato vine. I wonder if the fact that I accidentally broke off a big part of the yellow tomato vine has anything to do with that. I also need to get more stakes before more tomatoes develop. More plant reports: the cat found the garlic chives, so they’re dead; the thyme and rosemary are doing well, but the purple basil looks rather anemic and isn’t putting out very many new leaves. I’m thinking it’s getting choked out by all the other plants, and also isn’t getting enough sun, but as there are big oaks shading the patio during part of the day there is only so much sun that comes through.

I’ve done research on other non-Paypal donation systems and the only one that seems at all usable by personal blogs is this Tip-joy thing, but it’s pennies. I might add a link anyway. I refuse to put ads on my site — I just don’t like them. If I ever set up a web-shop for all the stuff I want to sell I’ll put up an ad for that. I am wondering if it would be worth going through Half.com — it seems less complicated than Ebay (I can’t find my password for that anyway and I think it goes to a defunct email address). I don’t know. I really need the money — gas may be down but food prices are still ridiculous and my last electric bill was over $100.00 even though I live in a 500 square foot studio. I hope it will be down this month as last night and tonight was the first time in a month I’ve had to run the a/c.

Oh well. I am going to try to write some more of my novel — one of my novels — ooh, shiny! (Slap!) Anyway, I need to get working on that. If I have anything I think worth putting up on my fiction site I’ll post a link.

Added: one more drawback to the Tipjoy thing is that you don’t get cash from all the donations — you either get an Amazon gift card or you can transfer all your tip take to a charity. Meh. I need cash! 😉

For some reason that they did not disclose in their announcement, Amazon is discontinuing its “Honor System” payment disbursement setup, so I’ve removed the tip jar link from my sidebar. They apparently have another donation system, but I don’t know if it will work out for website donations, I have to investigate further. In the meantime, I still have the Paypal link, for those who don’t mind using it. (I know a lot of people have trouble with Paypal for one reason or another. I will look into an alternative to Paypal for you folks.)

PS: there seems to be some trouble with my hosting service today as well. I had a lot of trouble getting onto my ftp site to edit my templates. If the page is slow to load, that’s why. (And, well, if it doesn’t load, you won’t be seeing this announcement anyway.)

Update: all of Amazon’s other payment systems look to be for e-shop sites, and its donation program is for official charities, so it looks like I won’t be using Amazon’s services.

Okay, I finally found a Christmas theme that is not too loud or flashy or cartoony, like most of the other WordPress themes seem to be. (Do a search for “WordPress Christmas themes” and tell me if you think I’m wrong.) This one is elegant, simple without being plain, and easy to read, at least on my monitor.

That being said, now I can announce my Christmas Fundraiser. Times are tight, and I still don’t have a job, etc. I’ve spent most of the past hour uploading my resume hither and yon. It’s difficult, because I really don’t want to commit myself to a permanent position since I’m planning to move out of the state in April or May, a date that is getting closer than ever. A temporary position that will last those few months will be ideal.

Update: do you think it would help if I added to my resume that I’m not gay? Heh heh.

…is the way they always gild the lily. They could be content with a simple statement, but no, they have to add something unnecessary and extra that makes you want to punch them in the face. Take Sartre, for example, a dead French guy whose philosophy the hipster set likes to claim they base their lives on. (They don’t, though — at least in this country the actual world view of those who can afford to waste their time pretending they read rambling, incomprehensible nonsense by Derrida and Foucault is based firmly in their staid, butter-on-white-bread Protestant-work-ethic bourgeois upbringing.) But as I was saying, take Sartre, as quoted in this article:

“Man is not the sum of what he has already, but rather the sum of what he does not yet have, of what he could have.”

Now, see what he did there? That last section, so not needed: “…of what he could have.” Bitch, you already said “the sum of what he does not yet have,” you don’t need to say it again in a slightly different way! Don’t you just want to go back in time, walk up to him where he is sitting at his little café table with his little glass of wine and his cigar or whatever and deck him?

Hey, here’s a new idea for an episode of Doctor Who:

SCENE: It is 1931. a Frenchman sits at a café table on the Champs Elysée. It is Jean-Paul Sartre. He is drinking cognac and reading a French magazine.

(Wheeze wheeze wheeze wheeze VWORP VWORP VWORP VWORP.)

A blue box with the words “POLICE PHONE BOX“ on it materializes in front of Sartre, who is nonplussed. The box is the Tardis. The door of the Tardis opens and a tall, thin man in a long brown coat steps out. It is the Doctor. He is carrying a cricket bat. He approaches Sartre and looks down at him.

DOCTOR: M. Sartre?

SARTRE: Mais oui!

DOCTOR: Jean-Paul Sartre?

SARTRE: (warily) Yes, monsieur, that is my name.

DOCTOR: The Jean-Paul Charles Aymard Sartre, the existentialist philosopher, playwright, novelist, screenwriter, political activist, biographer, and literary critic, one of the leading Figures in 20th Century French philosophy? (Ed: the Doctor reads Wikipedia.)

SARTRE: (Amazed) I am?

(The Doctor then raises the cricket bat and brings it down on Sartre’s head. Sartre falls out of his chair and sprawls inert on the pavement.)

DOCTOR: Not any more.

(The door to the Tardis opens. A young girl with long brown hair, wearing jeans and a sweatshirt with the initials CUNY across the front of it looks out.)

GIRL: Is it done?

DOCTOR: (Looking down at Sartre.) Yup. When he wakes up in the hospital he’ll have forgotten everything he learned at the Sorbonne. He’ll decide to go into chicken farming in Provence. Being and Nothingness will never be written.

GIRL: Thank you, Doctor!

DOCTOR: Now, who’s next on the list… (Still speaking, he and the girl go back into the Tardis and close the door. A few seconds later the Tardis dematerializes.)

************

(Slate article via Kathy Shaidle.)

Yes, the post you all wait for, wherein I rant and rave about trivial, petty things that would never bother a normal person. To begin:

First, the word “bespoke.” It means “custom made for a specific person” and originally was supposed to refer to articles of clothing. I know this because I looked it up. It’s not a new word. However, I have only noticed its use recently in publications sold to the public, and the word as used is applied not only to jackets and such but also to furniture, carpets, and other products for the home. And it PISSES ME OFF to no end. Why can’t they just say “custom-made”? “Bespoke,” though apparently a term in use for a long time, is obviously one of those words that are meant for the specialized ears of the fashion industry and the people who depend directly on them. The reason why is because such words used in public sound unbearably twee and precious, and any normal (ie, non-fashion-world denizen) person hearing these words are probably allowed by law to beat the user of such words like a red-headed step-child. Come on, doesn’t reading the phrase “the foyer, with its red wallpaper patterned after a 13th century Kyoto wall hanging and containing a charming bespoke divan upholstered in chartreuse dupioni silk” make you want to find the person who wrote that and beat them with a tire iron?

Second: the way people have started to refer to areas around and in a house as “space.” For example: on one of those tart-up-your-house-to-sell-it (because, duh, no one wants to buy a house cluttered with worn 80s furniture, kids’ toys, with a kitchen covered in a fine layer of old toast crumbs and dried orange juice) shows, people were referring to the home’s back yard and patio as a “lovely space.” It’s a fucking yard and patio, not a “space.” If I’d been working for days (while HGTV’s cameras rolled) in mowing my lawn and cleaning up my back patio, I’d feel rather insulted if someone implied that it was an empty void, which is what “space” more or less means.

Okay, that’s all for now.

She’s got it all except for being a crippled lesbian, and this being the acting universe we’re talking about, news that the latter requirement is fulfilled might soon surface (and there’s also time to put to literal use that old acting saw “break a leg”): a proposal for a British actress of Nigerian and Jewish descent who was in a movie about genocide for the part of Number 11 in the Doctor Who series. This is a riff off a recent proposal of a band of female scientists for a female Doctor, who with clunking earnestness declare that

…making a high profile sci-fi character with a following like Doctor Who female would help to raise the profile of women in science and bring the issue of the important contribution women can and should make to science in the public domain.

Never mind that for most Who fangirls one of the current main attractions of the show is the geeky-hot male star, with the attached fantasy of being his companion/girlfriend. The bad facts are that most girls don’t want to be in charge, they want to be with the guy in charge. Also, math is hard. And this is after decades of girls-can-do-it-too propaganda. They just ain’t listening, and that can’t be blamed on the culture anymore. (Besides, the show has already had plenty of female scientists — companions Jo, Liz, Romana — who was also a Time Lady — just to name a few. Don’t mess with fangirls. We know it all.)

I’m sure you’re all dying to know how my health is doing. Well. I’m over my cold, and back to sneezing because of my normal allergies. I really have to vacuum and dust this place. Oh, and that ear wax problem I had? It went away by itself. Most stuff usually does if you just let it alone. I think it helped that I always take long, hot showers, and the humidity must have helped loosen up the wax, allowing it to drain out. Also I’ll bet you I had some sort of ear infection or irritation that caused swelling. Also I started taking the real (as in, the controlled substance that is the only one that works) decongestant, and that helped. Anyway, I can hear again, and that stuffed feeling is gone from my ear canal. I didn’t go to the doctor either. I’ll bet you if I had I’d still have a swollen ear — they’d have poked and prodded and irritated the inside further. And I’d have to take medicine. And I’d have a huge hole in my tiny store of money. Well, I do have that, but that’s from food and other necessities. I find that I can’t go with daily meals.

I feel well enough to start walking again. It’s a nice day — partly cloudy and sunny, temps in the 70s. I wish it were a bit cooler, but that will do. I shouldn’t waste this weather. Also, since we’ve had cold weather early a lot of the trees have changed color. In past years we’ve had rather warm winters, and the trees (the ones that do change color, the maples and so on) just sort of turned brown some time around January. But I’m seeing red and orange and yellow. I can’t wait to move up north where I’ll get a proper autumn at last.