Yeah, but is this character as irritating as the Token Black Sacrificial Lamb* in the Dungeons and Dragons movie? (The lousy one with Jeremy Irons phoning it in for a mortgage payment on his vacation home and That Guy Who Looks Like That Guy (But Isn’t) From Sliders and Crossing Jordan, not the Surprisingly Good Other One that I caught on the Scifi Channel a while back. By the way — future post tie-in! — the Lousy One had Classic! Doctor Who’s Tom Baker in a cameo role as some sort of Elder Healer Elf, and he threw the whole mishegass off by actually acting instead of droning his lines or chewing the scenery like the other cast members — I hardly want to call them actors. My ex-boyfriend made me watch that movie and it wasn’t So Bad It Was Good — it just sucked.)
(Via Kathy Shaidle, who must now fear my eventual appearance at one of her bad movie shindigs now that I have a car. I know how to get to Toronto, Kathy! I have Google Maps!)
PS: no, really, Dungeons and Dragons: Wrath of the Dragon God was surprisingly good. Mostly because the actors — all no-names to me — played it straight, without that “shit, this is just stupid, at least I can pay for the Ferrari and the condo this month” vibe at all perceptible. It’s the only way you can do these things — any indication that you’re “in on the joke” causes the whole thing to fall apart. That’s what used to be called “acting,” by the way. Nowadays “acting” is just another word for “upset your grandma” — even if grandma’s a hippie who smokes a bowl every night before she drinks her Cepacol.
Update Edit Note: Bruce Payne appears in both D&D movies — the lousy and the not-so-bad — as the character “Damodar.” I can’t remember him in the lousy movie — probably because my mind, what was left of it, was overwhelmed by the suck of Jeremy Irons’ performance as the Mage With The Wall Street Stockbroker Haircut, and that of the Token Black Screaming Dying Guy, whoever he was. A waste of CGI, that first movie was.
*Trust me, this character had “You want him to die” written all over him. I’m talking Adric-level He Must Die-ness. It doesn’t get worse than that. Or so I hope.
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